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Toe rings and nose rings for a better sex life

Indians do not canoodle in public.

Indians do not hold hands in public. 

Indians do not gaze at each other in public. 

The only thing Indians do uninhibitedly and unabashedly in public is defecate and urinate.

Yet how did we manage to become 1.27 billion people?

This question is particularly baffling because Indians do not do so many things in public and don’t really have much space to do them in private either.

toe rings
toe rings (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Last night after dinner while our multi generational family was engaging in some interactive family time, the conversation as usual centred around family and more family. Father-in-law and mother-in-law were in full cry apprising Daughter No 1 (who is currently visiting from the US) of  family trees, family gossip,social mores and customs long antiquated and abandoned but still alive in their memories. While talking about women covering heads and why we do not cover heads, FIL came up with this pop question :

DO YOU KNOW WHY WOMEN WEAR NOSE RINGS AND TOE RINGS?

Looking at our non plussed expressions he triumphantly came up with this explanation :

FOR BETTER SEX.

That was a conversation stopper for sure and we quickly picked up our dropped jawlines and quietly crept into our respective bedrooms looking down pointedly at our un-toe-ringed feet .

While I know that sex was not invented by the young and that it was vigorously practiced by our ancestors
( or we wouldn’t be here today, would we? ), I was quite amazed to find it a part of a normal U Rated after dinner family conversation, for Indians don’t talk about sex in public either. Still reeling from the shock of hearing the word SEX mentioned so openly by my octogenarian FIL, I thought that may be he did have a point there .
Consider this :
His mother was one of  eight daughters
He himself was one of seven siblings
My husband is one of three siblings
My own grandfather was one of seven siblings
While my own parents were one of four
I have only one sibling.

Also consider this :

His grandmother and mother as did my great grandmother and grandmother, wore nose rings and toes rings every day of their lives.
His wife and my mother in law wore them occasionally.
His daughters and daughter in law wore them only on their wedding day

there is a correlation between sex and the rings on your nose and your toes.

So throw out those romantic dinners with candle light and roses – go instead for the time and tested desi aphrodisiac, get your nose pierced and wear those rings on your toes .

p.s. Our grannies really did know best.

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8 thoughts on “Toe rings and nose rings for a better sex life

  1. Oh, I love this! I am an American woman who wears rings on my nose and my toes every day. I have for years. I sleep in them, though I do change them often for variety. My husband loves them. I have always liked them. Who knew they made our sex life so satisfactory!

    I can visualize the whole scene. Not many Americans would be completely comfortable with their in-laws talking about sex, either!

    Thanks for such a fun post!

  2. Love the thought. Accessories do add a certain amount of dimension and attraction to the human body. I’ve been wearing a nose ring for a few years now and love it. Used to wear toe rings too, but it’s been a while I did. Reminder to start wearing them again 😊
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